ThiRd WeEk PraCticAl...

This week was quite relaxing as we had to handle another preschool class cause both the teachers were on course for two days. So, no ABM and lesson plans for two days =).
After three weeks here, i felt that the students here were quite rude. I thought all kampung school' students will show their respects to teachers. In fact, the students were not scared with the teachers at all. I heard got two Year Two boys in this school kissed with each other and they always go to toilet together. What is happening to the children nowadays?? I would like to share one incident which happened yesterday. I had to releave Year Six class as the teachers were having meeting. I had a small game with them. After half an hour, they asked me to bring them to library. I was hesistated at first but they kept begging me. In the end, i said OK! I was following at the back of the students, then, got this one boy asked me to walk first. I felt suspicious but i just walked passed him. I didn't know what he did behind me and i felt something was going wrong. So, i insisted him to walk in front of me. He met up his friend in front and i heard his friend asked 'dapat tak?' and he said 'tak'....I had no idea what they were up to and this made me became more cautious. I was sitting in front in the library, reading a book. I heard some 'soft-enjoyed scream'. I looked at the back of the library and the voice was gone. Then, i continue reading my book and i heard the 'scream' again. So, i stood up and walk towards the students behind. Suddenly, a boy sitting on the chair, pushed his chair out and sat quite far from the table. And guess what, i saw a boy crawled out quickly under the table and took a book to read. That moment i was shocked cause i didn't know what were they doing. I heard a boy said 'mata dia terbeliak'. I was just standing there and not moving cause too shocked. I hoped they were not doing 'something'. I asked them what they were doing and they said nothing. I asked their names and they seemed scared. My voice was shaking when i talked to them. I sat back and i used to 10 minutes to calm down myself. I wasn't really sure what they were doing. I think i must prepare myself for any situation in future.....

SecOnd WeEk PraCtical......

This week was a disaster. I felt really and extremely tensed up + tire + headache . I don't like this school!! I don't like the BIG TEACHER there!! I don't like some of the teachers there either! The school is not welcoming at all. BUT i can't complain all these cause i chose this school. My lecturer had warned us not to take this school but my partner and i had no choice cause of transportation. I can't cry either cause people will think that this is only practical and u already can't take it, so, how are you going to face the reality next year?!!
The problem that ocurred was the BIG TEACHER asked us to come every saturday and sunday cause they got this program for those chosen 9 target students of UPSR. Only practical teachers will be there to handle this, with no other teachers to help around! (of cause the teachers are not willing to come on weekend too) How are we going to do all this?? UPSR is a very important exam and how can he let us do it? We do not have any experience and we don't even know the format or questions regarding UPSR. We were just trained as a preschool teacher. 6 years old and standard 6 is totally different. Besides, the BIG TEACHER also asked the parents to present as well. What if the students or the parents ask us something and we are speechless??!! Furthermore, saturday and sunday is the only time we can rest and do our lesson plans + ABM.. We also have our own lives, coming to school everyday is not a joke!
We told this to our lecturers and they were pissed off. I think they won't send any practical teachers to this school in future. We went to see the BIG TEACHER and he was like so mad with us, saying we gave excuses and threaten to write report about us. I really don't like this, using something to threaten us. He said all this years those practical teachers will just do whatever he asked to, never complain or gave reasons. Why not he put himself in our shoes. We have to prepare lesson plans, 4 slots a day, with more than 10 ABM a day. Teaching preschool is not as easy as he thought. He always say to us 'awak prasekolah tak ada masalah, 15 orang murid saja kan, 6 orang 6 tahun.' Problem is he doesn't know how is the real situation, with 9 students of 5 years old. Each of them has health problem. One of them has one eye side which is totally blind, another one keep vomitting every time after eat, anemia, bully and so on. The BIG TEACHER had no idea about all this. All he wants is us to solve his problem. Even the teachers there said that he is a person who wants everyone to listen to him and he will repeat the same thing for months if anyone goes against him.
Today, we felt like we caused a lot of trouble, to our lecturers and the teachers there. I don't know what the BIG TEACHER will do to us after this. Whatever he wants to do, i'll just BUAT BODOH cause we left only 4 weeks there. I hope 14 august will arrive soon cause i'm already very tire facing each day!

FiRst WeEk PraCticAL....

Finally, first week of practical is over. This is the 3rd and final phase of our practical. This practical is really challenging. I keep telling myself, it's ok to have barriers cause this is the time we gain experience and to learn. This time i got an urban school, and my lecturer don't really agree with my choice. They kept saying the negative things about the school and it really pissed me off. Are they suppose to do so???!! I mean, it's ok if we face problem cause this is the time we learn to adapt in different kind of environment. What if i face a worse school in future?? Am i suppose to sit down and cry for the rest of my life??!!
Their words bothered me so much on my first day to school. I wondered, will it as bad as what they said. My school is a very small school with only 265 students and 20 teachers. My preschool class has only 15 kids instead of 25 kids. I thought that it will do me good with just 15 kids but i was so wrong. 9 of the kids are just 5 years old, which means it will so tough to teach them. Having 15 kids is like having 50 kids. They are so active and threating the school as a nursery place, eat, play and then go home. Well, this happen due to their environment. Most of them are from a poor family, they come to school without having any meal. Not to mention that few of them have health problem. It's really pity looking at their condition. One of them is under weight with one eye that totally can't see anything and wearing a specs with 800 power.
I had a hard time teaching them the first two days. It's hard to control them and i almost wanted to cry. I kept telling myself that i must prove to my lecturer that they are very wrong of what they had said. I trained the kids and made some activities on the third day and i felt relief. They were not as bad as it seems. They just need a little bit of discipline and love. The preschool teacher was very nice and friendly too. So, never judge a book by its cover. Next week will be the starting of observation. Hope everything goes well...

Finally..

After tomorrow, life has to be back to usual. Waking up at 6.30 am, going for assembly, classes, practical, assignments, exams and courses. Three weeks of holiday is coming to the end and our final sem has arrive, the sem that we waited for so many years. There'll will be so many tasks to be done and all the challenges that we have to face later. Only one sem to go and next year all of us will be separated. Only left one sem for all of us to be together, as classmates and to be in the place where we are always protected. Next year, we'll have to face the real world with the greater challenges. I wonder if i will be able to do all these by myself. I'll sure miss the time when we were studying, having fun around with no worries.

Guess Guess Guess

Try to guess what am I:

I am a very important material to everyone...
I can caused happiness and joy...
I can even caused disaster and sorrow..
I can make people smile and laugh..
I can even make people cry and suffer..
I can make people' s dream comes true..
I can even make people fight with each other..

People work hard to get me..
People will even quarrel with their besties to get me..
People will even kill each other to get me..
People can never see anything else besides me..

I AM EVERYTHING!!
So, try to guess what am I??

Hoping For Better..

Why there seemed to be no bond between us??
I thought we were supposed to be very close to each other??
I knew u went through so much for me..
I knew u suffered lot for me..
I knew u never stop sacrificing for me..
I knew everything u did is just for me..

But WHY??
Why u never thrusted whatever i said??
U just listen to other people!!
Why u accused me whenever something turn up??
U just don't believe me!!

I still remember those words u said before..
I still remember those things u did to me before..
I still remember ur face expressions that time..

I admit that sometimes my words hurt u..
And i'm sorry for that..
My heart was in pain too whenever I saw people scolded u..
How I hope I can give them a piece of my mind too..

I tried to forget the bitter part..
I tried to remember the sweet part..
I tried to be close with u..
I tried to have good talk with u..

Things never work out between us..
Or may be I'm a very sensitive girl..
I just envy people out there..
Because I wanted to be like them too..

It's holiday....

Hoorraaayyy!! It's holiday!!! Finally, after gone through a busy, hectic sem with quite-hard exam, it's time to enjoy and relax. Last week exam was like hell, i could only sleep for 2 hours every night, fearing what i had read will be flown away. I guess that whole week i was very nervous and tensed up. The exam papers were really torturing, two hours and forty minutes to finish up four essay questions and ten subjective questions. I kept writing till i couldn't do it anymore as my fingers began to shake which also made my writing looks like primary kid's writing. But who cares, as long as it's all over now and i'm having three weeks holiday....i can wake up anytime i wanted to, eat whatever i craved for, go anywhere as i wished....life is just wonderful....Happy holiday to all my friends, enjoy yourself before our final sem arrive =)